Asalam alyakum

I bought a book, a book that had great recommendations on Amazon, Good Reads, and from a friend.  I was excited…a book about Islam that the general population, and not just Muslims are reading — and I thought I might use it as a book club to interact with the followers of IHiP.  So what book was this, you ask, what is this “fantastic” book?  It’s called Mother of the Believers: A Novel of the Birth of Islam by Kamran Pasha….but I have a lot to say about it, and not much of it is good.

First of all – it’s not fantastic.  It’s horrible.  It started out okay, I liked his introduction, I liked his rationale for choosing to do some of the things he did in the book…and within the first 100 pages, I was brought to tears.  I was really excited.  Then it just went all to hell.  His story telling is weak at best, he has really horrible foreshadowing…at least once in every chapter you read something like “If only I knew of the darkness that was to come…”  Okay, I get it, something bad is going to happen.  On the whole, I think his writing is rather shallow and immature.  Maybe my standards are too high…but I just don’t like it.

That’s the extent of my critique on his writing…now to get to the story.  I must preface this with the fact that when I bought this book, I  thought that it was going to be a story about the birth of Islam akin to the film, “The Message” with Anthony Quinn (which is a great movie by the way!  Watch it!).  I thought it was going to be retelling of this story but from Aisha’s (ra) point of view.  Boy was I wrong.  This is a story that is loosely based on the rise of Islam but filled with all kinds of additions, omissions and what I personally feel is an anti-Islam agenda.

Some my reasoning for this opinion:

• Throughout the book, Pasha seems to forget that Islam gave women the right to choose who they marry.  Not once is it mentioned in this book – in fact, it’s quite the opposite – women are married off left and right to people without even a consultation on her part.
• As we know, the wives of the Prophet (pbuh) all lived together, each with their own room.  Pasha, however, doesn’t choose to call it a room…nor a dorm, not even an apartment.  No, the word that Pasha chooses to use for the places where the wives of the Prophet lived — CELLS.  Yes, that’s right…cells…like a jail cell.
• Pasha explains why he choose Aisha’s age of marriage as 9.  It makes sense: at that time, girls were considered women once they began to menstruate.  BUT – he also plays on this youth, in a way that makes it repulsive.  On page 179 he writes, “Not knowing what else to do, I crawled up beside him and put my arms around his chest.  I pressed my small breasts against his chest, hoping the nurturing comfort of my budding womanhood would bring him some peace.”
• If that isn’t enough – after the verse is revealed that the Prophet’s (pbuh) wives are not like other women….they begin to wear face veils…the author has Aisha think “For whenever I ventured out into the sun, my face would be hidden away behind a veil. The bars of my jail would follow me everywhere and were unbreakable, forged from a tiny strip of cotton that was stronger than the mightiest Byzantine steel.”

There are many, many, MANY other issues I have with this book, but I don’t want to say anything more than I have.  When it comes down to it, the further I got into this book, the more I felt as if I was doing something wrong.  I have never been one to give up on a book….but I have on this one.  I have only 40 pages left, and I cannot finish it; I’ve tried, but I just can’t do it. I was talking with Nye last night on skype and told her that this book is so bad, I feel that I need to repent after reading what I have.  I feel like this is a chic-lit story written about Islam.  I’d compare it to a Harlequin Romance writer choosing to tell the story of WWII – seriously, how good of a job can they do?

In the end it all comes down to this:  The story of the birth of Islam is already greater than any human could ever attempt to tell.  Stay with your original, and best of source (the Quran) and don’t bother with this book.

By: Reyhan

Assalamu Alaikum!  So back in November I submitted an article, it was picked as a feature article and posted here.  In the last few months I have had to trust in Allah(swt) more than ever.  I went through a bad spell of depression and was so far down at the bottom….I was on the verge of shutting everyone out.  I was….down and out.  I was still praying my salat 5 times a day.  I was still making dhikr.  I was still listening to nasheeds.  I was still going to the mosque.  Everyone seem to think I was the model muslimah.  I was being talked about in several different mosques.  People wanted to talk to me.  People wanted to know my story.

I can’t say I liked the attention. But I also didn’t shy away from it.  I did wonder though how people could see me as they did.  Every time someone asked how I was, I would respond alhamdulillah.  Their faces would light up.  I thought, if they only knew the truth.

The truth…I was down and out.  Going through the motions.  Trying not to lose hope.  Trying to keep going on with my life as if I was fine.  But I wasn’t fine.  I was in a very, very dark place.  I was wearing all black.  People thought I was trying to be pious.  It was more like mourning attire for me.

I don’t want to get into a lot of personal details here but suffice it to say I am having marital issues and things are not turning out the way I pictured.  No, we are not divorcing.  We are staying together for our son.  That in itself is not easy for me.

I finally snapped out of it after a talk that my husband I had where I realized that no matter what I did or didn’t do he is not going to change his mind about our situation.

I have turned back into myself.  I did a lot of soul searching.  I am happy with myself again.  I am able to open my prayer rug and cry my heart out to Allah(swt) knowing that He knows what is best for me and He will help me and reward me, inshaaAllah.

No matter how down and out you are, realize that Allah(swt) is always there for us.  He never leaves us.  He will never leave us.  People(husbands) will come and go in our lives, but Allah(swt) is always a constant.  No matter what…..He forgives us, He loves us as we are.  We don’t have to put on airs or change anything about ourselves to please him.  (given we are not sinning of course and we are following His commandments)

Practice your ibadah, be yourself and love Allah(swt).  He loves you as you are and He will help you when you are down and out.

Fi iman Allah!
Reyhan

Now I’m walking into this humongous building, there are teenagers everywhere, I didn’t seem to notice any other Muslims. I was scared to go in alone, I made my big sister drop me off to my class. I felt like a little kid but I was just so nervous.

*Another side note: as a woman, I’m really sick and tired of being treated as a piece of meat or an object. When people look at me, they look at my physical beauty and judge me based on that. But, I am a woman with opinions that matter, I have a voice, I am a person with beliefs and values. I want to be seen for who I am not what I look like.

Oh, it’s that feeling that most Muslims can probably relate to in some way or form; the feeling of being the odd one out. That feeling that seems to come about whenever friends, colleagues or even family members arrange a get together or just a day out. The thoughts that usually run through the mind are ‘is it halal?’ and ‘how do I explain myself if I refuse to attend, AGAIN?’

Well, it has taken me almost a decade to figure it out, but honesty really is the best policy (the answer was staring me in the face all along), and that doesn’t mean having to be alone. It does take me a bit of a ramble to get to the point, but Insha’Allah I hope you can bear with me.

I would be the first to admit that I took being brought up in a Muslim household for granted and up until my late teens, was more interested in the material world, friends, popularity and getting the best (or at least what I thought was best) of what I had at that very moment. The upshot of that was that I was unhappy; I was constantly seeking the approval of those around me (especially friends…that fear of being alone), which as we all know is unhealthy if a person never knows the true purpose of their actions, and indeed their life. Teenage years (and growing up in general) can be challenging enough without having to try and adjust every other term/semester in order to fit into the ‘in crowd’. But then it came, the Ramadan of 2006, the year it all changed for me.

“Verily, you (O Muhammad) guide not whom you like, but Allah guides whom He wills. And He knows best those who are the guided.”  (Qur’an, 28:56)

It came as a shock to me and those around me; I finally realised I was a Muslim. I have a purpose in life and that is to please Allah (swt). I do have guidance in the form of the Qur’an and Sunnah. I will be held accountable for my actions not by the ‘in crowd’ or the fashion gurus, but Allah (swt). I finally found a source of true happiness and purpose.
Of course with all this came a need for change and with change there can be hardship. But the Prophet (saw) said:

“Verily, if Allah loves a people, He makes them go through trials. Whoever is satisfied, for him is contentment, and whoever is angry upon him is wrath.” [Tirmidhi]

Alhamdulillah, I adorned the hijab with relative ease, but it took me by surprise just how much my social activities (and some friends) would have to change.

Now here’s what I realised when I got to college and university. Friends will ask you to go out with them and there will be events that will be considered practically mandatory, but saying yes to avoid being the odd one out isn’t the answer. Here are a few scenarios that I myself have experienced and witnessed (see if you can relate to them).

Scenario 1: Your friends (Muslim and/or non-Muslim) want to go to the students’ union bar and considering everyone on campus/on your course will be there, you’re pressurised to go.

Scenario 2: Your friends/colleagues have arranged a lunch/gathering/day out, but you find that there will be both males and females attending, so the likelihood is that there will be unnecessary free mixing.

Scenario 3: It is the end of the year or someone’s birthday/wedding and you’re expected to go because it is and will be all that everyone will be talking about. However, you don’t know if the event is segregated and what type of environment will be the setting.

Scenario 4: It is time for prayer but you don’t know how to excuse yourself from the middle of work/lunch/friends/colleagues.

Scenario 5: Those around you see you in Islamic dress and think for example that you may be oppressed, an extremist or plain old fashioned. They seem to have the wrong idea about Islam, do you say anything?

So what do you do? Do you shy away from telling them how you feel for fear of isolation? Do you say yes or agree because you don’t want to insult your friends/colleagues? Maybe you don’t want to cause a confrontation? What is the answer?
The best thing you can do is be straightforward with them, but remember to be gentle and calm just as the Prophet (saw). Most people (if not everyone) will be willing to understand if you just explain to them that it is against your religion for you to attend certain social gatherings/events if they are not in a halal setting (this may require some explanation so try and keep clued up on your deen). It may be that your friends are unaware of Islam (an opportunity for some dawah?). Perhaps there are other Muslims in the group who feel they cannot say no for fear of being an outcast, but will if they know they are not alone. You’ll be surprised how willing schools/colleges/universities/employers are willing to accommodate you for your five daily prayers and other obligations like fasting. Remember:

“Satan only wants to cause between you animosity and hatred through intoxicants and gambling and to avert you from the remembrance of Allah and from prayer. So will you not desist?” (Qur’an 5:91)

“And it has already been revealed to you in the Book (this Qur’an) that when you hear the Verses of Allah being denied and mocked at, then sit not with them, until they engage in a talk other than that; (but if you stayed with them) certainly in that case you would be like them. Surely, Allah will collect the hypocrites and disbelievers all together in Hell” [Qur’an 4:140]

“Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him not sit at a table where alcohol is being passed around.” End quote. [Tafseer Ibn Katheer (2/435)]

“And those who do not bear witness to falsehood, and if they pass by some evil play or evil talk, they pass by it with dignity” [Qur'an 25:72]

It is without a doubt a challenging experience to try and keep a balance between the social and spiritual aspects of life. Even if you can’t remember a specific source or quote, if you are in doubt as to whether a thing is haram or halal, avoid it until you know. Never be afraid to say you don’t know, but always seek to find out because;

“..put your trust in Allah if you are believers indeed…” (Qur’an 5:23).

It is perfectly fine to be in the company of Muslims and non-Muslims, but if you find that you are unable to fully practice your deen because of some (and unfortunately at times all) of them, which consequently leads to you drifting apart, it is probably beneficial to you. After all, Allah (swt) knows best. This life is a test and we must have sabr because we will be held accountable for our own actions, and we are encouraged to stay in the presence of those who will help us in keeping on the straight path; gaining the best in this life and the next. Alhamdulillah, I myself have now been placed in the company of those who are understanding and remind me of what is good. If you find yourself alone or feeling down, remember that being the odd one out for a good reason is a good thing and:

“O you who believe! Seek help in patience and the prayer…” (Qur’an 2:153)
“So do not become weak, nor be sad…” (Qur’an 3:139)
“Verily, with hardship there is relief” (Qur’an 94:6)

You only have one life to make difference to yourself, others, the world around you, and the reward you will get from Allah (swt) Insha’Allah, so strive for the best in this world and the next.

Over the years I have always heard others say ‘trust in Allah’.  Though I always knew it in theory I never really knew it is my heart.  I have recently come to know the true meaning of this statement.  It is not something that is to be said non-chalantly with a laxidasical attitude.  O, trust in Allah and then poof…no matter what you do…all is good in this world and the streets are lined with gold.  No, that is not it at all.  Trust in Allah is far more than that.  It means that you trust in Him with your entire being.  Your mind, your heart, your body, your soul.  When a thought comes into your head, you push it aside and make dhikr.  Allah(swt) tells us in several places through out the Qur’an, remember Me. The word remember is written as dhikr in arabic.  Rememberence.  Call on Him, no matter what for whatever.  Why is this so hard for us as human beings to do?  Yes, we say we trust in Allah…but do we really and truely?  We worry about things until we m
ake oursevles sick.  There IS nothing we, alone, can do.  Only through trusting in Allah(swt) can we acheive all things.  No matter how bad things seem, trust in Allah(swt) and know that as long as you are doing what He commands you to do (worship Him) then He will see you through.  He will provide for you.  He will keep His promise.  We often forget after we say trust in Allah to say alhamduillah.  Yes, He tests us.  He tests us because He loves us and wants for us to enter Jennah.  And being the sinners we are, maybe these tests are way for Him to cleanse us of our sins.  It is His way of saying, wake up…do what I tell you and I will provide for you!  So, no matter what happens to you or how depressed you are or how bad things seem…trust in Allah(swt) and no that He will carry you through IF you truely trust in Him and do as He commands…. Fi iman Allah!

Her father was the Deacon, now Elder, of the Seventh-Day Adventist Church. She always participated in the activities that was expected of her. Friendly and loved by all they all encouraged her to attend a Medical Missionary/Theology College in Georgia. She always loved the medical field as she grew up for part of her life on the farm her father had. Often times they tended the animals illness’s and other minor things. When she was 12 she saw her little sister born since the 3 youngest were born at home. At age 14 she was the assistant mid-wife for her second sisters birth.

When she was 17 she headed down to the school, having just finished her high school. She was there in the Georgia mountains loving the life there and gaining such knowledge! She had heard that the class she was going to graduate with were going to Africa and the main language that they would need to know was french. So on her spare time she was learning french on a language learning program. Sometimes she would chat with some people who knew french, many of them were muslims. At first she made it her mission to help them to be Christian, but they always had a point to something and she couldn’t dispute against it.

She got to the point where she was angry, she didn’t even want to know about Islam. It made the world she knew seem so wrong. It took her out of her comfort zone. She kindly asked her friends to no longer speak to her about religion. She was no longer content with her life and her religion. So on her own accord she began studying Islam, and the more she learned about it the more she loved it. Everything made sense. When the church said that somethings we must have faith in and that we are not made to understand everything, Islam had a reason for everything they believed.

Her 18th birthday rolled around and many people had forgotten about it. She was sad and disappointed, as she knew the girls in this school were well known for their ability to throw modest and cute parties for their friends. When she came back to her dorm room there was a package on her door in a bag. She took it off and went and sat on her bed and opened it. It was the Quran! The Quran she had ordered almost a month ago! She had given up hope of it ever coming since it had already been so long. It was in her eyes as a gift from Allah.

9/11 rolled around and she heard about the crazy Preacher down in Florida threatening to burn the Quran, the book that had given her an understanding to life and peace for herself and with mankind. This is what triggered her next decision, she wanted to be a muslim. She knew it was the truth, she knew it was the only way to make it to Jinnah. To serve one God, to pray 5 times a day, to honor your mother first before any other…but she was in a Christian college, how could she fulfill this dream of hers? Her very good muslim friend from Algeria had said that she had over 1,000 friends. Of course she didn’t believe at first, but now she was so desperate to find a Muslim. She asked her Algerian friend if she knew any Muslims in Georgia. Her friend said that she didn’t but was acquainted with a lady in Florida. Through this woman in Florida she was able to leave the school and fulfill the dream she held. We can’t say that she has had the easiest time, as many of her friends
and families no longer speak to her or just strongly disliked her, feeling as if she had betrayed them.Though there are a few in her family that support her and this gives her more strength in what she believes. She was always taught to follow her dreams and to strive to fulfill what she believed to be right.

This girl is me.

After a few moments of post-salah reflection, I got up from my prayer mat thinking that I should call up a friend and talk about how forlorn I feel. There was so much on my mind that I didn’t know how to deal with, or rather I knew, but my heart wasn’t quite settled. My patience – something I have built up quite a bit – was wearing thin. Certainly, I was feeling much better after salah, but I still wanted some advice and cheering up.

Putting the mat away, my eyes fell on the Qur’an verse calendar that I keep on my dresser. It has passages from the Qur’an for every day of the year. It was already luhr and I had forgotten to flip it over for the day.

So I turned the page over to JUNE 10 – and stood stock-still.

فَٱصۡبِرۡ إِنَّ وَعۡدَ ٱللَّهِ حَقٌّ۬ وَٱسۡتَغۡفِرۡ لِذَنۢبِكَ وَسَبِّحۡ بِحَمۡدِ رَبِّكَ بِٱلۡعَشِىِّ وَٱلۡإِبۡڪَـٰرِ

Patiently, then persevere: for the Promise of Allah is true: and ask forgiveness for thy fault, and celebrate the Praises of thy Lord in the evening and in the morning.

Surah Ghafir (40) : Ayah 55

And that was all the assurance I needed.

As you know I have been filming a bunch of videos with Sister Rebecca.  I thought I would link them all here in a blog post, so that they are easier to get to. InshaAllah.

This series is based upon a book called The Prophet’s Ramadhan (saws)  It touches upon some of the things The Prophet (saws) would do before and during the month of Ramadhan. This is a wonderful book.  InshaAllah it helps you as much as it has helped me.

Playlist of all videos!

ALHUMDULILLAH!!!!!

Asalaamu Alaikum.

Wow. I just finished my first FULL Arabic prayer.  I have mentioned on my personal channel that I started doing my prayer in English.  My thought process behind this was that I needed to know exactly what I was saying in my prayer. It has taken me almost a year to learn how to do the entire thing in Arabic. I put it off for so long and I kept telling my self that Arabic is to hard for me. But the real truth of the matter is that I was to scared and lazy to learn it in Arabic.  I was ashamed of myself and I didn’t want to ask for help. (Not asking for help is somewhat of a theme with me)

I was content with my prayer being in English. It was easy,  it was something I knew, and it was pure laziness. I always told myself that Allah knew my heart and my intentions. But on the flip side… Allah KNEW my heart and my intentions. He saw that laziness and he saw the doubt there. I wasn’t pushing myself in my religion. I wasn’t pushing my prayer toward perfection.  I thought my pronunciation had to be perfect and flawless for me to even begin. It wasn’t until I was talking with my Sister In Law (through my husband because she speaks Arabic) that I started to feel the shame of my laziness. She was aghast that I didn’t know even one surah in Arabic. It was then and there that I went onto the site Mount Hira  to learn Surah Al Fatihah. This site is brilliant MashaAllah. It let me repeat… repeat… repeat, until I got it down onto paper and partly in my head.

I would sit during prayer and go over each word.  It would fill my mouth with bulk and at first I would spit it out. It would come out in a rush and tumble. It felt wrong and I felt self conscious. My husbands family would make me recite it over and over when we would skype with them.  They would giggle, laugh, and then congratulate me.  I felt they were laughing at me and how I said it. And I became closed off to learning more. I went months with the only thing I said in Arabic was that Surah during prayer. I kept my learning on hold. I didn’t want to learn anymore, I didn’t want to subject myself to the humiliation of ‘getting it wrong’.

Then two things happened almost simultaneously.  I went to the ICNA Conference at the end of May and it totally changed my outlook on Islam. I realized that most Muslims would give you their right arm if it would help you to become a better Muslim. And when people laugh or giggle at you for what you have accomplished… it is because of joy and happiness. No one was laughing at me… they were laughing FOR me. I also received a wake up call about how I viewed the Quran, all because I was blessed enough to watch Brother Nouman Ali Khan speak. If you don’t know who he is… then search him out.  This man changed my life, without realizing it. Alhumdulillah. He told a little bit about the story of  Musa (pbh). He made me realize the Quran had everything I needed… but my lack of understanding Arabic was closing me off from it. I came home and started searching Mount Hira again. And I found this hadith on their site that I didn’t see the first time.

The Last Prophet (PBUH) said: “Verily the one who recites the Qur’an beautifully, smoothly, and precisely, he will be in the company of the noble and obedient angels. And as for the one who recites with difficulty, stammering or stumbling through its verses (because he doesn’t know how to read it but is trying to), then he will have TWICE that reward.”

When I read this…. I am not going to lie… I broke down like a baby and cried my eyes out. I sobbed. My eyes turned red, my nose started to run, and my spirit filled all the way full with love for Allah. (I am even getting weepy just writing about it. lol) I decided that I was going to strive for a perfect prayer before the start of the month of Ramadhan. I would take little bites and do each bit until it became natural.  And Alhumdulillah today was the last little bit to learn. I now have a 100% Arabic prayer. It might be hard to listen to and it might be the worst pronunciation in the history of prayer… but its mine and its for ALLAH!

ALHUMDULILLAH!!!